Today is my birthday and I am blessed to have been showered with countless (although you can count if you want to) birthday wishes posted to my timeline (as is the custom on Facebook), traditional cards, and e-cards too.  But one post today encouraged me to "Have a Happy Birthday and Blog On!"  I thought about that birthday greeting, and decided I would do just that!

I love to blog about others, issues, education, and things that inspire me, but while I love to tell a good story, blogging about me is not something that comes easy to me, or a subject that I would imagine most people would want to read about.  But today's my birthday, so I am taking this opportunity to say some things that are near and dear to my heart.

I could talk about the things I love to do, the passions I have for the teams I cheer for, the places I love to visit, or the place I call home.  But today I will focus on the intangibles...those things you really can't measure or touch in terms of how they make you feel.  As the saying goes, the best things in life are not things.

I am blessed by a wonderful life.  I have a husband of 35 years, children, and parents that love me and support me in all that I do.  I am also loved and surrounded by siblings, in-laws and extended family.  But no one plucks my heart strings quite like my grandsons.  They bring a smile to my face and a warmth to my heart that is unequaled.  I am interested in things they do that I never thought were interesting before.  I want to come to their rescue if there is a problem, and have found strength and patience I never knew I had as a result of being bestowed with the title of "grandma."  Once when my oldest grandson slammed his fingers in the sliding door of my daughter's van at a KSU football game, I carried all 50 pounds of him to the ER at the hospital that was conveniently located across from the stadium, but still quite a distance from where we were.  On a normal day, I can barely carry in the bag of potassium for our water softener from the garage 20 feet into the house.  Yet on that day I carried him without a thought, and I wasn't even tired until I put him down.   The youngest grandson often greets me, running at full speed to give me a big hug, saying, "Graaaannndddddmmmaaa!" Whose heart would not melt at that greeting? Those boys inspire me to feel more and do more than I ever thought I could.

I am a collector of many things - blue glass, Santas, and moose to name a few, but I also collect "friend" items and quotes because friendship is important to me in ways many do not understand.  A quote by Vincent Van Gogh kind of sums it up for me:
“Close friends are truly life's treasures. Sometimes they know us better than we know ourselves. With gentle honesty, they are there to guide and support us, to share our laughter and our tears. Their presence reminds us that we are never really alone.”

Friends improve the quality of one's life and I am lucky to have many really good friends who make me laugh, and who appreciate and support me for who I am and what I aspire to do.  They have enriched me both personally and professionally, and some have helped me achieve my dreams of owning my own business and making a difference in the lives of others.  I am also fortunate to have a few very dear friends who I can rely on for just about anything.  Their love and support get me through the trying times, provide me the opportunity to get things off my chest and experience gales of laughter.  No matter the distance between us, we still get each other.  Mostly we can just share the everyday things without any fanfare or pretense.  I have enjoyed a week of lunches and good times to celebrate "my day," but in reality, it is just friends being friends.

I have also been blessed to have a career in education that has been fulfilling and continues to provide me ways to feel relevant and engaged in life.  I have made countless friends and acquaintances because of my educational experiences.  I love the interaction with students no matter what their age, seeing them grow and gain new understanding before my eyes.  This week I have had the additional blessing to be reminded by some former students, now adults, that I did make a difference in their lives along the way. I am humbled and grateful that they take the time to share this with me.  It is also endearing that some still call me "coach" despite the years that have passed.  I have so many fond memories of the times spent in the gym or at the track. Those are bonds sealed by sweat and tears and will never be forgotten.

Finally I know that without my faith in God that none of this would be possible.  The life I live is part of a plan that I cannot begin to fathom.  I know I'm here to make a difference some how, some way.  I know that people cross our paths and situations happen that seem insignificant at the time, but alter the course of our lives.  I know that I often plan and hope for things that never happen and while I am disappointed, I know that there is a reason - something bigger in the grand scheme of things - that I just don't see yet.  But when I look back later, I will see why something did or didn't happen and the result of that action.  I believe God supports me when I can't do it alone, but also has a sense of humor and winks at me to let me know He's with me.  I have a wooden cross hanging above my desk - a gift from one of those dear friends - that says "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding."   I love this and what it represents.  And it is from Proverbs (3: 5-6), my favorite book in the Bible, because it's full of God's locker room slogans for life!

My wish for you as my birthday comes to a close, is that you identify and celebrate the blessings in your life.  Find the good; focus on the silver lining, and see what a difference it makes in your life so that you may make a difference in the lives of others.  Enjoy your year - I know I will!

I don't know if it's by design or just coincidence, but this week, as a nation, we are celebrating Teachers and Nurses, concluding with Mother's Day on Sunday.  What a powerful combination of goodness to recognize and appreciate in the same week!   I don't know about you, but nearly every mother I know is a teacher and a nurse rolled into one!

My mother was a teacher by profession, but began as a teacher to my siblings and I at home, and a Sunday School teacher too, long before she got an "official paid" teaching job.  She read to us, taught us about the Bible, and how to cook, clean, and iron (which used to be a frequent and necessary task back in the day!).  She is a writer and encouraged us to write.  I think I'm the only one who writes on a regular basis, but we all "get it."  She wanted us to express ourselves appropriately and often told us if we didn't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all.  I'm not sure I learned that lesson quite as well as some of the other lessons....  She was my biggest cheerleader (and she really did have a lot of actual cheerleading experience), encouraging me when I was down, studying with me for tests, and celebrating with me when I succeeded.   Mom also had high expectations for my behavior and my grades.  She taught me how to paint without making a mess (and I'd better not make a mess!) which serves me well today.   About the only thing she didn't teach me was how to fix the farm machinery.  Those lessons, taught by Dad, seemed to be lost on her, although she could, and did, drive the tractor just fine. 

She was also a nurse to us - and still is if we let her.  She tended to my scraped knees and bloody nose events.  She came in the middle of the night bearing cough syrup when I was coughing, because I was probably keeping everyone awake.   She always has a pack of tissues in her purse and a few band-aids too - just in case.  I find myself stocking my purse in the same fashion.  She came and sat with me when I had a baby or knee surgery, trying to be as helpful as possible.  She took my sister to Colorado one summer and lived in a travel trailer because the Colorado air was good for her asthma. Mom is the caregiver even now when we really need to be taking care of her.  

She went back to college and got her Master's Degree and began her teaching career after we kids were in school.  Then she made a difference to a whole new generation of kids - acting as their librarian, history teacher, and yes - cheerleading sponsor!

It is often the teacher that students (and even parents) turn to when they need help and not just about school assignments.  Teachers think of their students as their own "kids."  How many times in recent years have we seen teachers lay down their lives to try to save their students from a rampage?  What we don't see are the many hours of planning and grading they do to ensure every student has the best learning experience possible.  We don't notice that they spend their summers taking classes or attending workshops to stay abreast on new developments in education.  We don't know that in their Walmart cart are some supplies that will be used at school, paid for from their own money.  We don't see them unable to sleep at night because of the pain or frustration being felt by one of their students.  Maybe we see a tear at graduation, or a big smile when students do well, but we probably don't realize that those moments are forever etched on that teacher's heart.

Nurses are also some pretty important people in our lives and play a big role in caring for us when we are at our most vulnerable.  My soon to be daughter-in-law is studying to be a nurse as I write this.  Her compassion for others and willingness to help probably came from her mother who is also a nurse.  Shortly after she and my son began dating, she had her first opportunity to gain nursing experience when on their band trip to the Pinstripe Bowl in New York City, almost the entire trombone section got the flu.  She tended to as many of them as she could until she too succumbed to the virus.   My son called wanting to know what he should do to help her.  So I gave him the best  mom's medical advice I could over the phone.  It's our moms we call first because they were our first teacher and our first experience with the medical side of life.  Moms fix us when we are broken or make sure that someone does!  As the old cough syrup commercial once noted, it's important to listen to "Dr. Mom."  

It is the nurse we often speak to first at the doctor's office after we check in.  They are the first line of defense when something is wrong, and might even know the patient better than the doctor does.   It is the nurse that checks on us when we are alone in the hospital wondering how everything will turn out.  Sometimes checking those vitals in the middle of the night may seem intrusive, but they are still a connection that we appreciate because it lets us know someone is there for us.  Nurses take care of us when we can't - doing those jobs for us that we would never ask someone else to do - and never thinking twice about it.  Moms do that too.  As much as we love our dads, unless it's something in their realm of expertise, we almost always call Mom first when we have a question or news to share.  And this weekend, telephones will probably be busier than usual since it is documented that more calls are made on Mother's Day than on any other day of the year!   

I must acknowledge that there are a lot of great male teachers and nurses out there, but when you think of the traits and skills of those two professions and add them together, they equal what we believe to be true about mothers.  Moms teach us what they know so we can get along better in the world.  They take care of us when we can't and never hesitate to offer to help however they can.  As our apron strings are loosened, we depend less on our mom's in part because of what they have taught us, but also because they know we need to leave then nest in order to thrive.  No matter where we "fly off to" we will always need their caring touch and reassurance that we're doing the right thing.   Thank a teacher. Thank a nurse. Love and thank your mom too. Appreciate them all this week, and every week, because it's the best gift you can give them!

I never understood geometry very well when I was in high school and found proving theorems to be tedious and totally NOT useful to me at all.  I studied and made it work, but it wasn't until much later that I finally I discovered that geometric principles would be very useful to me in the real world. Now I look back and wish that my high school Geometry teacher had helped me see how I might use this information with things I actually enjoyed.  Instead it wasn't until I taught Physical Education and began coaching, that I realized the importance of angles and shapes in my world as I needed to know how to pursue a faster opponent, diagram offensive plays, determine defensive strategies, and understand how they affected nearly every event in track and field.   In other words, geometry suddenly became relevant to me as an adult because I learned how to use it in the real world (transfer). Of course geometric principles are not confined to PE or sports, but actually happen in so many things we do like driving, hanging pictures on the wall or designing work space in the kitchen.

Something that is relevant has a connection to the subject matter; is pertinent; and applicable. It also must be something that interests and challenges us.  Relevance makes rigor bearable and learning meaningful.  If something is relevant, I get it.  My interest is piqued; I am interested, and therefore I care enough to learn it well or find out more.  Those "aha" moments we have are sometimes as a result of inspiration, but many times occur because a connection has been made and the material we once thought was difficult, suddenly makes sense, becomes relevant, and leads us to understanding... even Geometry!

We need to know and be able to do "stuff," but more importantly we have to know how and when to use all that "stuff" we know and can do.  Otherwise, it all becomes useless trivia, or memorized information that eventually slips into the abyss of our minds.  It is often said by many, including me, "if you don't use it you'll lose it."  I find that to be true about the things I've learned and filed away in my brain as well as the physical skills that I once possessed.  I wonder how much I failed to learn along the way because I didn't find that meaningful connection that allowed me to USE that information, and therefore save it for future use?  

This begs the question, "How do I make what I need to learn relevant so that I will be more apt to learn it well and use it again?"  I cannot rely solely on others to make that happen for me.  I have to be able to find connections for myself and be responsible for my own learning.   As educators and parents, we have to teach our kids how to make those connections and not just blow off a particular topic or subject as "boring" or "too hard" or because we perceive it as irrelevant!

Think about the people who don't care about a particular issue until it affects them personally.  Now that issue has become relevant because they care about how it impacts their life or the lives of their family or friends.  Relevance requires some emotional attachment to the learning, issue or situation.  We have to feel its importance and find a way to connect it to our own way of thinking and doing.  The kind and quality of the relationship you have with the person who is teaching you or the people you are working with affects the degree of relevance, and thus, the need to understand or to act.

Relevance requires an answer to the "why and when" questions we have.  Why do we have to learn this?  Why is this important?  When will I use this information or skill?  Consider how recognizing this need would improve the kind of directions we give and ultimately the quality of the results?  This concept relates to the business model of "Why, How, and What," by Simon Sinek that I discussed in a previous blog.  If we address the "why" before telling people what to do and how to do it, then we immediately increase the relevance because we have answered one of the big questions that helps us prioritize our need to know.  This applies to teachers, parents, bosses, and just dealing with the general public.   

History is an example of a subject that some people love and others loathe.  "Why do I have to know this" is a frequent lament of students.  There are many reasons to know and understand what happened in the past so that you can plan for the future.  But knowing that intellectually is much different than personally feeling the connection to "the need to know."  CBS recently went "On the Road" to North Carolina and found a 5th grade teacher that inspired his students to learn history by re- enacting a battle from the Civil War as a class project. The research required to produce the culminating activity (re-enactment) helped this significant piece of history become relevant to students who live in today's high tech world.  (To watch this short video, click here.)  I would encourage you to listen to and watch the details that have been learned.  Feel the emotion and empathy these children have experienced.  Rigor and relationships played a large role in making this learning experience relevant, and therefore, meaningful.

We all learn differently, have different interests, strengths and weaknesses.  So as educators, it is up to each of us to help students learn how to find relevance in what they study.  Parents face the same challenges.  Taking the time to get to know someone (relationships) improves the chances we will understand those individual preferences so we can help students find meaning in the challenges (rigor) of their learning experiences.  I know for myself, that relevance is a motivator that gets me going and keeps me interested.  This is especially important if the task is not something I really enjoy. 

Relevance also requires us to stay fresh and be willing to change and grow.  What are you doing to be relevant?  To teach in a relevant way? To encourage relevance in your own kids or students?  What is relevant today may be irrelevant tomorrow.  Once upon a time I kept a diary.  Now I blog or journal on my computer.  Once I was proud to have typed 50 words per minute on a manual typewriter.  Now you find them in museums and antique stores.  Finding relevance requires effort.  Staying relevant requires reflection and revision.

Finding relevance is an intentional behavior and is most often present when there is sufficient challenge to interest me, and the necessary relationships to support me.  Only then will this new learning be beneficial to me in another situation down the road and not just saved for a trivia contest.  Even Geometry can become meaningful.

I have been blessed to have grown up in a family of educators, to have been influenced by some amazing teachers and coaches as a student and as a colleague, and to have chosen education as my career.  It is the season to think of the blessings we have been given and those that have accompanied us along our lifelong path.  Where would I be today without the guidance and influence of the great educators that taught me, mentored me, and inspired me?  Teaching is not just what I do; it's who I am.  I am a life long learner because the teachers in my life made learning fun for me, and helped me see the importance of knowledge and understanding.  More importantly, they gave the greatest gift of believing in me and helping me to see that I was capable of many things if I only put my mind to it.  The connection between teacher and student or coach and player, is a powerful one that transcends the content.

I am still thinking about the heroic teachers who protected and loved their children through that horrific tragedy last week in Connecticut.  I am thinking of my nephew who is leaving his paraprofessional position to complete his degree, and how much he impacted the students he is leaving behind, and truly how much they impacted him.  I am thinking back on the many little gifts I received from students wanting to wish me a Merry Christmas, and while those were special, and many still hang on my tree each year, the light in their eyes and the warmth of their smile as they wished me a Merry Christmas was the greatest gift of all.  

I am thinking of my college friend, who taught and coached in Texas, and died unexpectedly last year, and the outpouring of love and admiration that was expressed by the many students she taught as they dealt with the loss of their beloved teacher and coach. 

I am thinking of my dearest friends who are still teaching in the classroom everyday, trying to make a difference in the lives of children who may not truly understand all that they are learning is not in the textbooks or the lessons planned for them.  As teachers, we often wonder if what we are doing really matters.  But all it takes is one thank you, one hug, one look at the light in the eyes of a child or a grateful parent, and you know with all your heart that you are doing what you were meant to do.

I also feel blessed to have the opportunity to continue to teach when my grandsons crawl up in my lap to read a book, or to be able to help them with homework, or to show them something they've never seen before.

So thank you to the many teachers who have gone before me... whom I probably didn't tell often enough (or at all) how much they meant to me.  And thank you to the schools who hired me, the students and colleagues who made me want to come to school each day and see what could be accomplished, and to the schools who allow me to come in now to help improve the teaching and learning in their building.  God blessed me when he put that idea in my head a very long time ago that I wanted to grow up and be a teacher.  What a wonderful journey it has been!