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Vicki's Blog

My thoughts on education, improvement, and life itself.  Enjoy!

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The 3 R's:  Rigor, Relevance and RELATIONSHIPS!!

3/18/2013

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This is the first of a 3 part blog series on what I believe are the most important 3 R's we can have in education and actually in our own lives.  While the old familiar 3 R's of "reading, 'riting & 'rithmetic will get us a lot of places in this world, and are still very important, it is my belief that the 3 R's of Rigor, Relevance, and Relationships will make the old standbys even more meaningful!

Today I will begin with the end in mind ... a familiar theme lately in my blogs and educational life. Relationships might be listed last in the title, but they serve as the foundation for all the other R's you could list!   Why?  Because the relationships make us care and help us connect.  Consider the oft quoted saying, "no one cares what you know until they know that you care."  When you learned the most, it was because there was someone who cared and that made you care.  When we are moved to act, it is often the result of the influence of a meaningful relationship.

Relationships are the key ingredient to our lives as individuals, as families, as learners, as employees, and as church or community members.  We all have and/or need people with whom we connect, can trust, and can work with to achieve a common goal.  That relationship begins with our families but is enhanced by our friendships.


Yesterday, I watched with interest as CBS Sunday Morning profiled the importance of friendships as their lead story (click this link to view the video).  One of the most significant things they noted was that friendships make us stronger and help us believe things are more manageable and easier to achieve.  Studies have been done to prove this.  MRI's on the brain show us that we are calmer and less stressed when comforted by a close friend.  The closer the friend (in terms of the relationship) the calmer we are.  I personally am blessed with a wide circle of friends and a few very special friends who enrich my life and create a network of support that I rely on frequently.  This is not just a woman thing either!  Men want and need friends too.  While the way they conduct their friendships may differ, the bottom line is that we all need someone with whom we can connect, can offer support, and can give us perspective.

Fostering positive relationships in schools is something that will lead to better learning, better behavior, and less bullying.  To put this in perspective, Dr. James Comer, Yale University Professor of Child Psychiatry, says, "No significant learning occurs without a significant relationship."   Ruby Payne, a proponent of helping educators work with students in poverty agrees, noting that "When individuals who made it out of poverty are interviewed, virtually all cite an individual who made a significant difference for them."  Many programs, such as Big Brothers-Big Sisters and other formal mentoring programs,  promote significant relationships as a way to boost achievement and improve quality of life for the children/teens participating in these programs.

When considering rigor or relevance, it is often the influence of a teacher, coach, or other mentor that makes us want to achieve the higher expectations required of rigor.  Their interest in us makes us interested in what they are trying to teach us, thus increasing the relevance of the learning.  There are so many simple ways to make a meaningful connection with a child or adult for that matter... just saying their name when you greet them; a warm smile; a word of encouragement; or acknowledgment of effort or progress.  Any of these simple acts of kindness make a difference and cost us nothing but a moment of our time.  


Teachers should get to know students so that they understand learning styles and preferences, interests, strengths and weaknesses.  All those are important ingredients to planning effective lessons and creating positive learning environments.  These positive environments can make champions out of moderate talent.  Just look at what Bill Snyder has done at K-State with players who weren't blue chip recruits, but who have bought into a traditional system in modern times because of the relationships that exist between coach and player; school and player; and the K-State community and the players.  But this is not just about teachers or coaches.  All of us need to take the time to invest in the children in our community so they know that they are supported and someone cares about their dreams.  

As we consider how to improve education and the quality of our own lives, we will no doubt include Reading, 'Riting, 'Rithmetic, Rigor, and Relevance, but we must keep in mind, the foundation for all these "R's" depends on Relationships, because without them life has little meaning. 



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Leading From the Bottom Up

3/14/2013

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Leadership is usually associated with the view from the top.  But too often, leaders fail to see what everyone else sees because they haven't taken the time or felt the need to find another perspective.

Before you say, "I don't want to read this blog because I'm not a leader," keep in mind we all are leaders in some form....maybe not intentionally, but at least by design, because of the roles that we have as a parent, spouse, employee, church or community member. 

Leadership is something I do, something I have had done to me, but most importantly, is something I am interested in improving.  I have a shelf full of books with thoughts on leadership.  I subscribe to Dan Rockwell's leadership blog (food for thought in an efficient 300 words or less!)  And I firmly believe, as my friend Dayna always says, "Leadership Matters!"

There are many ways to examine the effectiveness of leadership styles.  So let's focus on changing an often used pattern that does not produce the kind of results one would like to have.  My question becomes, "What would leadership look like if it was viewed from the bottom up?"

True leadership is about people.  Often our leaders are about management, which involves "things".  How differently would our results be if we focused on the leading of people so that the "things" could get accomplished?

The business model of Why, How, and What developed by Simon Sinek, and shared by Lois Brown Easton in Learning Forward's Tools for Learning Schools from an educational perspective,  shows us how leaders can inspire action and sustain the changes that are being implemented.  A typical top down initiative would find the leader telling you what to do and how to do it, leaving you asking why and feeling like you've been forced to act as you mumble under your breath.  We've all experienced this whether it was our father, a teacher, or our boss and it feels like, "Do as I say!"  And the answer to our often unspoken "why" question, is "Because I said so!" 

But what if the leader had shared the why first, helping stakeholders understand the need for change, before presenting the how, and the what? Consider how that one strategic move could adjust your whole attitude toward the change?  

Why clarifies.  Why sets the stage.  Why allows opportunities for stakeholders to ask their own questions and can lead to a belief that the change is necessary so they are more receptive to how it will occur and what they will have to do.  So in effect we have reversed the typical outside - in pattern.... looking now from the inside - out, considering the thoughts and feelings of the people you lead in order to get things done!  

The people are the heart of any group or organization.  Keeping their perspective in mind helps you to lead inside - out and from the bottom up!  Not only does leadership matter, how you lead matters the most!





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    Author

    Vicki Bechard, 
    Owner and Lead Consultant

    I express myself best when I write, even though most who know me think I talk quite a bit!  

    I'm an educator first and foremost whether my students are kids, teachers, or my own children and grandchildren.  

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