The mounds of daffodils and tulips were brimming with buds, had just started blooming around our yard this past weekend while temperatures soared into the 70's.  But of course, we live in Kansas, so they were not shocked early Tuesday morning when temperatures dipped into the 20's.  These are tough flowers, ready to face whatever challenges Mother Nature sends their way.  I thought about covering them, but did not.  I hoped they would make it through.  I hoped they would bloom anyway.  The temperatures rebounded quickly, only to be followed the next day by a howling wind, with gusts big enough to move vehicles on the road, send trash cans rolling out into the street, and whip those new blooms into frazzle.   But today, with calm winds on a cool, partly sunny, spring day, the daffodils and tulips continue to open new beautiful yellow and red blooms, denying the Kansas weather victory despite it's best shot.  They did as I had hoped and bloomed anyway.

And isn't this the way many of us face life?  What takes down one person, is just another obstacle to hurdle for another.    Some of us just bloom anyway.

Kansas educators have taken some real gut punches in the last few weeks as politics reared its ugly head in the legislature.  There were some wins for kids and teachers alike, but they came with a price.  But when it was all said and done (and really it's still not done), teachers went to school and taught their students, coaxing them to bloom, just like the do every day.  Political battles may take their toll, but we still are able to experience the true beauty of teaching and learning.  It would be nice to make more money, have general support from the public, and have tenure to protect us from undeserving criticism, but no matter what, we are educators first and we will find a way to bloom anyway.

As a teacher, I saw many students over the years demonstrate their ability to persevere and stand tall despite the odds stacked against them.  There is no greater joy for a teacher than to see a smile spread across a child's face when they finally get something that has been difficult to understand; or when hard work pays off for an athlete so they are able to feel the joy of a personal best and perhaps earn a medal too.  Some kids give up easily while others dig down deep and find a way to bloom.  Maybe they weren't as smart or talented as their peers; maybe no one supported them like they should have, but somehow, some way, they found a way to bloom anyway.

I see this same thing happening right now with people that I know.  Some are fighting cancer.  Some are dusting themselves off from a failed relationship, loss of a job, or other disappointment.  Some just can't figure out why today, of all days, that tire went flat on their way to work.  But I see their determination to emerge from these pitfalls and sometimes tragic events.  I see them find ways to bloom amid frustration and bad news.  I see them deepen their faith and offer comfort to others, whose plight might be just as dire as their own.  We  win when we choose to stand strong and bloom anyway despite overwhelming odds.

It is the resiliency of the tulips and daffodils that inspire us during their fight to give us a burst of color as we emerge from the grays of winter.  It's easy to bloom during those springs when temperatures are warm and rains fall generously.  It is in those times of personal challenge, when others may have said it couldn't be done or stood in our way, that makes us appreciate our efforts to stand strong and bloom anyway.  

Have you watched the Lego movie that has been in theaters recently?  I watched it with my grandsons, thinking that I was doing them a favor, when really that movie did me a favor.  It had a great plot for kids - but also for the grown ups that took them to see the movie (good idea movie makers!).  The underlying premise:  You'd be amazed at what you can accomplish if you believe you can. Recognizing that often comes when someone else believes in you or notices what you have done.  As a parent, grandparent and educator, this is gold.

When Accomplishment Leads to Optimism
Today as the sun shines into my office, I am feeling like I am feeling accomplished and ready to tackle another project!  There is a whole new attitude exuding from me!  Why you ask?  What did I do that was so life-altering?  

Did I get a new job?  No - nothing that big.  But I finally completed a job that I have put off for a long time - because I guess I didn't have the necessary motivation to tackle it!   I have finally re-sorted the books on my shelves that I so deliberately put in alphabetical order by author when I first moved in a couple of years ago.  Why is this a big deal?  Because I look for TOPICS not authors, so I have had to look through every book to find the appropriate resource unless I know who the author is.  Today's little accomplishment has organized my office, made resources more available and useful, and will help my friend who needs some information from my wealth of resources.  Yes, her request was the necessary motivation I needed to overcome my procrastination.  She believed that I could help her and suddenly the state of my resources took on new importance and made me not only want to do the job, but do it now!  I feel proud, energized and ready for the next project!

Believe In Me so That I Can Believe in Me
So you think it might be silly to blog about such as reorganizing my books?  I think not.  Optimism and hope are reasons to get out of bed each day regardless of our age or vocation.  Without those things we feel unmotivated and irrelevant.  Every day I walk into my office, look around, shrug and think I'll reorganize another day.  What does it matter?  It's just me in my office.  Everyone else can stay out.  But when someone else needs you, then suddenly, it matters - because what I am doing matters to that person, and as a result, matters to me.

Relationships are important to the quality of everyone's existence.  We rely on others to help us see more clearly, provide us with feedback, to share our hopes and dreams, and to help us feel validated or relevant.  What messages are we sending to others?  Do we let them know we believe in their ability to succeed, and recognize their progress?  Our words and actions let others know that we believe in them or not; that we value them or not; that we support them or not.  

The Power of Positive Intent
What is Positive Intent?  It is not merely optimism.  It is a belief of ability, that what can happen will happen, of expectation rather than failure.  It can be held by the individual, by others about the individual, or by groups.  It's what you think about, how you phrase your self talk or what you say out loud to others.  It is an expectation.  It's a big deal and it sets people up to succeed... or not.

Establishing expectations is a way of providing someone with belief in their ability to succeed.   It is positive and intentional.  You can... you will...  In school, we provide rubrics so students can guide their own learning and know when they have met the expectations.  In everyday life, we provide parameters of time and quality to do the same thing.  

Allowing someone to do a job independently helps that person to believe in themselves because you "allowed them" to do it on their own.  Give them the tools to succeed but don't do the work for them.  Watch their face light up as they accomplish what they set out to do.  Remember the first time you tied your shoes, rode a bike, swam across the pool, or finished that first 5K, ALL BY YOURSELF?  It's that feeling of satisfaction that provides us optimism for the next job at hand.

As individuals, we have the ability to regulate our own thoughts, control our motivation, and ultimately our actions.  Like the Little Engine that Could,  "I think I Can" gets us through a lot of tough situations, but may not be enough.  Without the feedback or reinforcement from others, we are often unkind to ourselves.  We fail to appreciate what we can do or realize how much we matter.  Humans rely on reinforcement.   We don't need external reinforcement as much as we need to feel appreciated and valued.  And with those feelings comes the attitude of optimism and hope.  Life is worth living!
 
Are you the sunshine that someone needs to emerge from their gloomy day, the encouragement they need to take the next step?  Make a difference for others and for yourself.  Find a way to focus on the positives and share that optimism with others.  No one wants to be irrelevant.  I have another friend that closes every workshop by saying, "You matter."   I truly believe that and I challenge you to help make someone else feel like they matter too!