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Vicki's Blog

My thoughts on education, improvement, and life itself.  Enjoy!

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Counting Life's Blessings

7/9/2014

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Today is my birthday and I am blessed to have been showered with countless (although you can count if you want to) birthday wishes posted to my timeline (as is the custom on Facebook), traditional cards, and e-cards too.  But one post today encouraged me to "Have a Happy Birthday and Blog On!"  I thought about that birthday greeting, and decided I would do just that!

I love to blog about others, issues, education, and things that inspire me, but while I love to tell a good story, blogging about me is not something that comes easy to me, or a subject that I would imagine most people would want to read about.  But today's my birthday, so I am taking this opportunity to say some things that are near and dear to my heart.

I could talk about the things I love to do, the passions I have for the teams I cheer for, the places I love to visit, or the place I call home.  But today I will focus on the intangibles...those things you really can't measure or touch in terms of how they make you feel.  As the saying goes, the best things in life are not things.

I am blessed by a wonderful life.  I have a husband of 35 years, children, and parents that love me and support me in all that I do.  I am also loved and surrounded by siblings, in-laws and extended family.  But no one plucks my heart strings quite like my grandsons.  They bring a smile to my face and a warmth to my heart that is unequaled.  I am interested in things they do that I never thought were interesting before.  I want to come to their rescue if there is a problem, and have found strength and patience I never knew I had as a result of being bestowed with the title of "grandma."  Once when my oldest grandson slammed his fingers in the sliding door of my daughter's van at a KSU football game, I carried all 50 pounds of him to the ER at the hospital that was conveniently located across from the stadium, but still quite a distance from where we were.  On a normal day, I can barely carry in the bag of potassium for our water softener from the garage 20 feet into the house.  Yet on that day I carried him without a thought, and I wasn't even tired until I put him down.   The youngest grandson often greets me, running at full speed to give me a big hug, saying, "Graaaannndddddmmmaaa!" Whose heart would not melt at that greeting? Those boys inspire me to feel more and do more than I ever thought I could.

I am a collector of many things - blue glass, Santas, and moose to name a few, but I also collect "friend" items and quotes because friendship is important to me in ways many do not understand.  A quote by Vincent Van Gogh kind of sums it up for me:
“Close friends are truly life's treasures. Sometimes they know us better than we know ourselves. With gentle honesty, they are there to guide and support us, to share our laughter and our tears. Their presence reminds us that we are never really alone.”

Friends improve the quality of one's life and I am lucky to have many really good friends who make me laugh, and who appreciate and support me for who I am and what I aspire to do.  They have enriched me both personally and professionally, and some have helped me achieve my dreams of owning my own business and making a difference in the lives of others.  I am also fortunate to have a few very dear friends who I can rely on for just about anything.  Their love and support get me through the trying times, provide me the opportunity to get things off my chest and experience gales of laughter.  No matter the distance between us, we still get each other.  Mostly we can just share the everyday things without any fanfare or pretense.  I have enjoyed a week of lunches and good times to celebrate "my day," but in reality, it is just friends being friends.

I have also been blessed to have a career in education that has been fulfilling and continues to provide me ways to feel relevant and engaged in life.  I have made countless friends and acquaintances because of my educational experiences.  I love the interaction with students no matter what their age, seeing them grow and gain new understanding before my eyes.  This week I have had the additional blessing to be reminded by some former students, now adults, that I did make a difference in their lives along the way. I am humbled and grateful that they take the time to share this with me.  It is also endearing that some still call me "coach" despite the years that have passed.  I have so many fond memories of the times spent in the gym or at the track. Those are bonds sealed by sweat and tears and will never be forgotten.

Finally I know that without my faith in God that none of this would be possible.  The life I live is part of a plan that I cannot begin to fathom.  I know I'm here to make a difference some how, some way.  I know that people cross our paths and situations happen that seem insignificant at the time, but alter the course of our lives.  I know that I often plan and hope for things that never happen and while I am disappointed, I know that there is a reason - something bigger in the grand scheme of things - that I just don't see yet.  But when I look back later, I will see why something did or didn't happen and the result of that action.  I believe God supports me when I can't do it alone, but also has a sense of humor and winks at me to let me know He's with me.  I have a wooden cross hanging above my desk - a gift from one of those dear friends - that says "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding."   I love this and what it represents.  And it is from Proverbs (3: 5-6), my favorite book in the Bible, because it's full of God's locker room slogans for life!

My wish for you as my birthday comes to a close, is that you identify and celebrate the blessings in your life.  Find the good; focus on the silver lining, and see what a difference it makes in your life so that you may make a difference in the lives of others.  Enjoy your year - I know I will!


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When the PE Teacher Married the Carpenter

5/31/2014

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School’s out for summer and now it is the season for weddings… at least in our family!  While we have no new weddings to celebrate this year, Friday marked the beginning of a 2 week period where quite a few of our family members have anniversaries.  And next year my son will join this celebrated group with his own wedding during this time frame!

35 years ago in a little town in North Central Kansas, the PE teacher married the carpenter.  She spent her career in education and he had his own construction business before becoming everyone's favorite mailman. Together they have touched many lives, raised a family, created a home, and shared many experiences that filled a lot of photo albums.  Together they have built a very successful life with the hope and faith that there will be many more years to share. 

As you may have guessed, I am talking about my own marriage and approaching anniversary. I look around and am amazed that it has been 35 years. As they say, time flies when you're having fun - or maybe just when you're really busy. Since our son will be getting married around this time next year, I am not only reflecting on our life together, but on the life he will have when he gets married.  So I guess today’s blog is not just a look back, but a way to share some lessons learned. 

Some people are probably surprised that we have lasted so long because on the surface we appear to be quite opposite. I talk quite a bit (no snickering) and he does too - but only if he doesn't know you. (He says we already know what he knows.)  I am a problem solver - a fixer of sorts in the thinking realm - and he is a fixer of things. I create by talking and writing; he works wonders with his hands. I am decisive; he is reflective. I like to think our differences are really our strengths and we complement each other.  We could probably be the poster children for how opposites attract!


We do share a lot of common interests particularly as it relates to the teams we cheer for and the projects we undertake. It is our differences, as well as our common interests, that have made our partnership work for us. It goes without saying - but I will say it anyway - that you rarely spend 35 years with anyone without a deep, abiding love and appreciation for the other person. Along with that foundation of love, the most important things we share are common values, respect for one another, and the desire to make a difference.

If I could share some advice with my son and his fiancé, it would be that these aforementioned beliefs, traits, and behaviors are a part of us every. single. day.  They shape the way we talk to and treat each other, show support, and generally live our lives. 


I believe one of the keys to our success has been rooted in finding ways to enjoy the interests of the other person. For example, I love sports and he appreciates them too, and as a result, has become an avid baseball collector. That interest has led us to antique stores and vacation destinations. At first I didn't really know what to do at antique stores since searching for newer items usually dominates my shopping experience, but I found things I love to collect too, and now I often come out with more treasures than he does!   But just to clarify, he has two entire rooms to support his collection and I have a display case.   We are supportive of each other's interests and aspirations and are not threatened by those things that not our "cup of tea."  The lesson here is that we can learn from others when we are respectful of our differences, which in turn often enriches our own experiences. 

Another strong point within our marriage is the ability to work together to make projects happen around the house or to plan events. Projects are engaging and require the strengths each person brings to the project. Admittedly I am typically more of an idea person than one who can make it happen when it comes to home improvement projects, but fortunately he can make things come to life with his carpentry and landscaping skills. Our home is a testament to his ability and our teamwork. When an event is the focus of our efforts, I take the lead and he is in the supporting role. These things keep us looking forward in ways that refresh our home or allow us to celebrate with others. Basically,  I think we just like to do things together!  Vacations are fun whether we are in the mountains or trolling antique stores.  Trips to Walmart or Home Depot can become a date night if we throw in dinner out.  In school, project based learning is often a favorite activity of students because it is active, engaging, and breathes life into mundane, everyday learning; just as in our case, projects and “doing” enrich our living. 

Finally, and probably most importantly, we have a common foundation of faith and values which guide most everything we do. We are respectful of each other - always. I am continually amazed at the hurtful things people say to those they supposedly love. Expressing your own thoughts is definitely important but does not require that you spew venom at the other. Respect is a two way street and one that should be intentional and automatic. As a result, it impacts so many other parts of the relationship. Along that line we also try to act in ways that are helpful to others.  Schools are finally starting to understand the value of relationships as it relates to a positive learning experience. The quality of our relationships, no matter what kind, is something all of us should be working to strengthen whether it’s at home, work, school or church. (And I might add, politicians take note!)

Today I celebrate our upcoming anniversary and the choices we made that got us this far.  Every day we have the opportunity to choose what to think and how to act.   I would advocate choosing respect and kindness and seeing what you get in return.  So far, I have 35 great years and counting….



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Blessed Are Those Who Educate Our Children

12/19/2012

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Image created by CowPieCreek
I have been blessed to have grown up in a family of educators, to have been influenced by some amazing teachers and coaches as a student and as a colleague, and to have chosen education as my career.  It is the season to think of the blessings we have been given and those that have accompanied us along our lifelong path.  Where would I be today without the guidance and influence of the great educators that taught me, mentored me, and inspired me?  Teaching is not just what I do; it's who I am.  I am a life long learner because the teachers in my life made learning fun for me, and helped me see the importance of knowledge and understanding.  More importantly, they gave the greatest gift of believing in me and helping me to see that I was capable of many things if I only put my mind to it.  The connection between teacher and student or coach and player, is a powerful one that transcends the content.

I am still thinking about the heroic teachers who protected and loved their children through that horrific tragedy last week in Connecticut.  I am thinking of my nephew who is leaving his paraprofessional position to complete his degree, and how much he impacted the students he is leaving behind, and truly how much they impacted him.  I am thinking back on the many little gifts I received from students wanting to wish me a Merry Christmas, and while those were special, and many still hang on my tree each year, the light in their eyes and the warmth of their smile as they wished me a Merry Christmas was the greatest gift of all.  

I am thinking of my college friend, who taught and coached in Texas, and died unexpectedly last year, and the outpouring of love and admiration that was expressed by the many students she taught as they dealt with the loss of their beloved teacher and coach. 

I am thinking of my dearest friends who are still teaching in the classroom everyday, trying to make a difference in the lives of children who may not truly understand all that they are learning is not in the textbooks or the lessons planned for them.  As teachers, we often wonder if what we are doing really matters.  But all it takes is one thank you, one hug, one look at the light in the eyes of a child or a grateful parent, and you know with all your heart that you are doing what you were meant to do.

I also feel blessed to have the opportunity to continue to teach when my grandsons crawl up in my lap to read a book, or to be able to help them with homework, or to show them something they've never seen before.

So thank you to the many teachers who have gone before me... whom I probably didn't tell often enough (or at all) how much they meant to me.  And thank you to the schools who hired me, the students and colleagues who made me want to come to school each day and see what could be accomplished, and to the schools who allow me to come in now to help improve the teaching and learning in their building.  God blessed me when he put that idea in my head a very long time ago that I wanted to grow up and be a teacher.  What a wonderful journey it has been!

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    Author

    Vicki Bechard, 
    Owner and Lead Consultant

    I express myself best when I write, even though most who know me think I talk quite a bit!  

    I'm an educator first and foremost whether my students are kids, teachers, or my own children and grandchildren.  

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